A cowboy appeared before Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Have you ever done anything of particular merit," St. Peter asked?
"Well, I can think of one thing," the cowboy offered.
"On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman. I ordered them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face; kicked his bike over; ripped out his nose ring and threw it on the ground. I yelled, 'Now, back off or I’ll kick the shit out of all of you!'"
Saint Peter was impressed, "When did this happen?"
"'Couple of minutes ago!"